i turned 21 in prison

I am really excited about football season this year. Normally I just enjoy football. But this year I have been looking forward to it. Partly, I think, because of all the other things that football season means. Fall, winter, snow, sweatshirts, excuses to sit and eat all day, Thanksgiving(more eating), my birthday... But this year I am really excited about the football too. Can't wait to start watching it. Don't worry though. I doubt that I am going to become one of those rabid, live for football kind of guys. It's just something that can be really fun. And I am going to enjoy it this season.

Lots of thoughts about dreams lately. Maybe I'll share this weekend after I catch up on a little sleep and can actually put together something coherent about it. (not that sleep will help that...but I did spell "coherent" correctly! yeah for thousands of dollars worth of private education)

I know it is strange, and I am quite suprised about it myself, but I have really been enjoying life lately. I figured the whole "thing" that I just went through would take a little longer for me to find my way through, as has been the case in the past. Not a bad thing that it didn't take as long as I thought. And I am really enjoying the fact that I have been enjoying life. Its a nice change for me. And please, if it seems like I am having an off day or something, remind me (and reminding includes anything up to smaking me upside the head) any way you choose to start enjoying things again.

Way too much usage of the word "enjoying" in one paragraph. (Oh, I should throw in this disclaimer. I may still be sarcastic from time to time. But I "enjoy" being sarcastic. So it's ok)

One last thing. I finally watched Serenity this afternoon as I got rained on while I was attempting to play disc golf and wass forced to go to Blockbuster instead. I have been intending to and really really wanting to watch this movie since it came out, and that has been long enough ago now that I cannot really remember the actual why of why I wanted to watch it other than that it just looked interesting to me. And boy am I glad I finally did. Great movie! Must go buy soon to watch over and over. Wished there was a little more of Rain kicking butt...but I'll take what I can get. If you like sci-fi even a little you need to watch this flick. So many great lines...

mood: contemplating another one of my Blockbuster pick-ups
music: "Hello" -Evanescence

fumes

Abe Lincoln was one bad dude. Ok, so I have never heard that before. But think about it. He was the president during the CIVIL WAR. And you know back then he wasn't going to see his therapist every coupla days to share his "feelings" and crap like that. Nope. Everything just stayed bottled up inside. Can you imagine if he had just snapped and went off on someone?! Dude! He would have messed them up! And this makes him a bad dude in my book. Definitely someone to put on the "let's not ever really make this man mad" list.
(why am I using "dude" so much??)

Remember last night when I was saying...well, I said that I wasn't going to complain as much anymore. So I'll just leave this one alone.

But I do think the cd player in my truck is about to die. It has been dying a slow and horrible death since I have had the truck, but I think now that it may be taking its last, rattly breaths. (is "rattly" even a word?) Sad day when it does happen. Maybe I could give it a proper burial if I took it out to a field Office Space style and laid it to rest...

Well, I am off to get a few hours of sleep. And its not even 11 yet! I must be getting old when two nights of beyond midnight hours kick my butt as much as it feels like right now.

mood: confused
music: "The Back of Your Hand" -Dwight Yoakam

"see how they run"

I really like the piano intro to "Lady Madonna" by the Beatles. The rest of the song is kinda annoying, but that intro...

The sewer line in my parents house started to back up again tonight. Meaning I got to move everything in my room so the guy that comes to fix the problem can get to stuff.

I really need to figure out what is going to be the next step in the job related area of my life so I can figure out if I can move out of my parents house again. I really don't enjoy being here too much. But I am glad that they are kind enough to let me stay while I need to.

Why did I stay up late again when I was probably tired enough to go to sleep three hours ago?

I am excited about work tomorrow! I am going to have probably three to four hours of driving to do, all told, tomorrow. And I am going to get to do some actual work at a house all by my lonesome self! So I bought a couple of cds tonight so I could have something to listen to tomorrow. I bought the new Crossfade album; couple of good songs but not the greatest. Maybe it'll grow on me. And, because of all of Jessie's talk about Evanescence (and the fact that I have always really liked all their songs that I have heard), I bought Fallen. Listened to that one all the way through already. Great disc! I like. Going to be a good day of workin. Provided I don't spill an entire can of stain in these people's kitchen. I can just see myself doing that for some reason...

Ok. This was going to be a short post. Guess I messed that up. I promise I won't ramble on and on in all my posts. Just most of them....


mood: sleepier by the minute
music: "Raining In Baltimore" -Counting Crows (live recording)

teasers

Don't you hate it when you open the mailbox and see something that you totally think is something that you have been waiting to get, and you get really really excited, only to find that it isn't even for you?!

I stayed up so long now that I have forgotten all the profound things that I had to say. And I'm hungry again. But you know what they say about eating after midnight...

My mom can do crosswords way too quickly. Kinda scary.



mood: finally a little sleepy

music: "Peace of Mind" -Josh Gracin

the fruitfulness of nothingness

Weekends are wonderful things. I am pretty sure that I did almost nothing productive this entire weekend; and I liked it. I atually did do things, for once, just nothing productive.

Tonight was a little sad. I watched the Emmys. And I wanted to. I fully intened to watch all three long hours of it. However, after watching the first two hours, rather impatiently, I opted to watch a rerun of Grey's Anatomy instead of the end of the Emmys. Good choice.

I did happen to see that The Office won. And WOW! In watching the show I have always thought that the girl who plays Pam, Jenna Fischer, was pretty cute. But she has to play a receptionist that isn't really trying to be too attractive. So when I saw her up on the stage tonight...WOW! She is really quite a beautiful person.

And that's all I'll say on that subject.

One other Emmy note. I have really started to like Conan O'Brien in the last year or so. Used to not like him so much; never really thought he was too funny. But lately, much funnier. As you may know, he was hosting the Emmys this year. Probably my favorite thing I heard all day was when he was doing his opening monolouge for the night and said "It's my second year hosting, and as you'll see tonight, the third time's the charm." Ok, not the funniest line ever. Pretty much your first year comedy writer could come up with that. But the fact that it took as long as it did for all the brainiacs sitting in the audience to figure it out...that was funny.

I really like Creed. I know they are so "like yesterday" but I have been listening to them more the last couple of days and I have to say that I'm likin it.

Well, I'm off to bed to digest the entire pizza I ate tonight.


mood: actually looking forward to morning

music: 3 A.M. -Matchbox Twenty, acoustic recording (awesome, awesome, awesome)

cardboard boxes

Ok. So my trip down to the office to drop stuff off ended up taking me like four hours. Yes, I am a little on the slow side. I know. But usually not that slow. I ended up talking to my boss for a really long time I guess. It was good though. Actually was kinda a relaxing way to spend a Saturday afternoon. (Kathy, I'm sorry you had to spend your entire day working. Yuk.) Then I went and played some disc golf with Adam. Which again, was very relaxing and fun. Not always a given that the Saturday afternoon sports are relaxing, you know.

Probably the best thing that happened to me today though was what my Mom said to me when I got home tonight. I was just about to head downstairs after I had been talking to her and Dad for a minute in the kitchen. She gave me a hug and told me that I had been pretty grumpy and withdrawn (wow, what an understatement!!!!) but that I was better now. Then she threw in that the whole grumpy whithdrawn thing had been while I was still engaged to that person. And ya know, she's right. (Yes, I just said that my Mom wass right about something. Parents are from time to time.) I'm not sure that I am all the way better yet; but I sure feel like I am close. Really, really close. And I feel good. Especially the last couple of days. I've actually been happy! Not just not sad. Happy. Like excited about stuff and hyper at times! This is not normal for me. Regaurdless of the state of my life, it takes a lot for me to be hyper; especially hyper more than once in the space of just a few days. And you know what?! I like it. I like it a lot!

Anyway, when I started this post all I wanted to say was a big thank you! to all my friends who have helped me get to this point. Without you I may very well have ended up living in a cardboard box by now(hence the subject line). I love you guys! You are what makes life enjoyable and interesting. You are what makes me open my eyes to the world around me and still be able to laugh and smile at what I see every day. I wish I could give every one of you a hug that could somehow allow you to look into my soul and see how much I truely owe you.

The song Hide by Creed was just playing on my computer as I was typing the last couple of paragraphs, and it is playing again now. Usually I think of Creed as having a fairly depressing sound, which is one of the reasons that I like them. However, as Hide was playing now, it struck me as...it sounded more...it just made me happy!! Am I on crack or something or has this ever happened to any of you. If you can, please listen to it and let me know. Maybe what all this hyperness and happieness means is that I finally went off the deep end...

Well, now that no one is reading this anymore I'll wrap it up. Thanks. Life is good. And really, I am going to try to stop complaining about stuff as much as I have been lately. So please, if you catch me doing it around you feel free to smack me upside the head and tell me I have a good life.


mood: happy and looking forward to a bed

music: How to Save A Life -The Fray

numbers

I just went over the 2700 song mark on my iTunes. I know that that may not seem like a lot of songs to some of you, but I'm pretty excited about it. And I still have plenty of cds to load onto my computer at some point. It's just a matter of getting motivated...

Also this week...I hit the 100,000 mile "milestone" on my truck. I am excited about this, but slightly sad as well. Sad mostly because most of the driving that I have done in it has been for work. The other day I looked at the notebook that I record my mileage in for work to see what it was at when I started getting compensated, a whole whopping three months ago, and I have been averaging more than three thousand miles a month since then!!! That is way too much driving for a job. Granted I get some nice relaxing, scenic drives out of it at times; but more often than not it is just them deciding to send me to opposite ends of town on the same day. Oh well. Guess I shouldn't complain too much about it. I get paid for it, right.? I sure hope I'm getting paid for it.

Well, I gotta go. Why? Cause I get to drive to work, on a Saturday, to drop off my hours for this week and pick up my work for Monday morning. You may be asking why I have to do this on a Saturday. I'll tell ya. Because I get to be up in Winter Park between 8and9 Monday morning and that would be a little better than a two hour drive from our office...meaning it would be logistically impossible for me to be at the officce Monday morning. So I get to waste half of a nice Saturday afternoon doing work crap.

Maybe I should look for a job that I would really enjoy. But that's the thing. I actually do like the job that I have right now. And it could be a really great job, if ... I'll just stop right there seen as how it's really not going to help anything by going on anyway.

Don't you hate it when your skin is peeling underneath all your leg hair? It's really hard to peel it off!!


mood: hungry, very hungry

music: I Think I'll Just Stay Here And Drink -Merle Haggard

view

This is me. And this is sorta close to where I live. Not like I'm sitting on my back steps or anything, but close. I love it here!

free range

So, it's been an incredibly slow week at work. I think I will be lucky to have gotten 30 hours once I add them all up. But it does have its perks. Like the fact that I am already home on Friday and it is only noon. And I have already been in a pretty good mood most of the day so the fact that I am done working for the week is just making it that much better. I did wake up with a SHEdaisy song runnin through my head though. Not quite sure what to make of all that...

Last night, just as I was drifting off to sleep, I saw that the Twins won! Not only that, but they scored 11 runs doing it!! That is just so awesome! I sure hope they make the playoffs...

Well, I am off to the driving range to see just how horrible my shot is right now. Uhg. This could put a foul spin on my day. But hey, I am going to be outside on a gorgeous afternoon and I'm not working. So I should be alright.

I am just so excited that I am not working right now!! That job is SO boring sometimes; it just makes everything go numb.

Have a nice afternoon at work!


mood: hyperly hyper

music: slide goo goo dolls

Pilot

Ok. So I've finally set up a blog so I can share my random thoughts and totally useless knowledge with others... I am very excited! And my heel has had an extremely painful itch all night. (I think I am going to enjoy sharing the useless information thing)

I know the name of my blog might be confusing some of you right now, and at some point I fully intend to further ignore whatever desires you may have for me to explain what it actually means. Ok, so I probably will end up explaining parts of its meaning over time; but for now you are just going to have to be patient.

Also, I know that my whole blog space that I have is really very minimalistic right now, no pics or any other fun llittle frills, but I promise to change that soon. As soon as I have a little time at a location that offers more than a dial-up connection...

So, to wrap this all up for now... Come back later when I actually have something to say!